Taking a Risk

Over at The Nester's blog, she asked today about risk taking.  If anyone feels like they have taken a risk, to post about it and join her party.  It stopped me in my tracks as I realized I DID take a risk.  

A big one.

Having been through 3 lumbar back surgeries in 12 months and still suffering immense pain, in hindsight it WAS a huge risk to move forward with the Spinal Cord Stimulator (SCS) trial and surgery.  Putting wires and leads in my spinal fluid?  Having a battery in my buttock?  Having wires threaded down my back, mid-back to hips?  Being told that a 50% reduction in pain would be considered a success.  50%?  

But you know what, 50% is a LOT of pain relief, when you suffer the pain I endure.  I have permanent, severe nerve damage.  After the 3rd surgery that DID stabilize my back, my nerves were left permanently damaged.  From what or when, no one will ever know.  But the S1 nerves in both legs burn ALL DAY and ALL NIGHT long.  Searing is a good word.  24/7.   And on really bad days, I get what I call "lightning strike" pain - a pain that will shoot through my hips and out my toes, down my entire leg.  Sometimes it is just a flash.  Other times, it stays a while.  Either way, it takes my breath away and if I were driving, I don't know if I could control the car.  (Reason #1 I rarely drive).  I've never been struck by lightning, but I imagine it would feel something like that.

After many months of suffering, my beloved neurosurgeon recommended I either try the SCS (Spinal Cord Stimulator) or get an implanted pain pump. NO other options.  

I was so scared.

What if it didn't work?

What if something went wrong and I ended up in a wheelchair the rest of my life? (Any time working on the spinal cord is a huge risk.)

But I was nearing zero quality wife and mother at that point......I lived fully reclined 24/7.....shouldn't I do it for them?

What happened during the SCS trial was almost inhumane.  A nightmare of epic proportions.

But at the end of the day, I STILL (even after that trial horror), went forward and trusted my neurosurgeon and trusted God that this WOULD be an answer.  That this WOULD give me some of my life back.

The SCS is like a pacemaker for nerves.  Have you ever sat in a massage chair to get a pedicure, or at a store?  Well, I massage INSIDE my body, 24/7.  JUST LIKE THE MASSAGE CHAIR.  It is the freakiest thing!  

But while my body is massaging, my brain is saying,"What is going on????  Why are we buzzing"?  While my brain is busy trying to figure that out, my burning/searing leg nerve pain isn't getting through at full intensity.  Hence, the relief I experience.  When my brain figures this trick out, we will be up a creek and looking at new options, I suppose.  But so far, so good.

And it did.   I'm not the old Cheri, never will be.  But I can walk longer than 30 minutes.  I can go out to dinner, I can go to the mall, I can go to a movie with my sweety.   I no longer live 24/7 fully reclined and that is a blessing.  My husband got most of his wife back.   He rarely comes home to find me crying.  That is huge.  There is only so much his heart can take.  Nothing more helpless than being a man who can't help his wife.   Little does he know that just letting me lay on his shoulder and cry means the world.

So today, my husband proudly tells people he has a wife with a remote control.  Who wouldn't want that?  lol   I can turn myself up, I can turn myself down.  I have to "charge" myself every few weeks.  I even have fun little tricks I can do that most SCS users don't enjoy.  God gave me a few little extra gifts, and for that I am forever grateful.

At the end of the day, I had to choose to trust a 4th surgeon to help me, had to trust that he wouldn't further harm me. 

He helped me.  An answered prayer.

I thank God for Spinal Cord Stimulation.

I thank God for technically excellent neurosurgeons.

I thank God for the most supportive, nurturing husband in the world.

I thank God for supportive family and friends.

I thank God for people who propped me up when I was ready to give up.

And I thank God for what I do still have. 

I am a lucky girl.

I try hard to make sure no one knows I suffer if they see me from a distance.  Only by watching closely will you notice the sparkle missing from my eyes, or you might see me stumble as I try to pretend I can still feel my feet and my balance is normal.  Ever the actress.

I pray you never experience pain like this.  If you do or if you know someone who does, please tell them about Spinal Cord Stimulation.  I'm surprised at how many people haven't heard of it.  It is designed for nerve damage pain in particular.  

I share my story on this blog because there are so many pain sufferers home-bound.  Finding others who understand, who truly understand.....is priceless.  I love the new friends and emails I receive from new friends I meet through my story.

So What Happened To Me?

Other links on the right hand:  Chronic Pain, Intractable Pain, Nerve Damage and Spinal Cord Stimulation.

Faith is powerful.

Trio of Fingerless Gloves

I found a new free pattern and have gone to town!  We knew we were going on a trip to see family, and I wanted to make something for my mom, sister and mother-in-law.  Even though they live in Texas and it is rarely cold, I can only make a few projects so far.  lol  So fingerless gloves it is!

I made a red pair to go with the red cowl I made last week and gave these to my MIL:

These are on backwards.....FYI.  lol

I decided to add a decorative edge on the other end.  I like it!

Here is the set - I had to use different yarn for the gloves as the cowl yarn was too bulky.

 

The gray ones were for my sister - this yarn is SO soft.  She is the one who pointed out the direction the gloves should be worn.  Thanks!  lol  (I pay SO much attention to pattern photos.  lol)

When I saw this yarn, I knew my mom would love it - lavender and turquoise.  I love how these turned out as well.  I made both of these in about 2 hours, AFTER I finally got the beginning ring figured out.  I discovered I can't carry on a conversation AND crochet.  Good to know!

Would you like to make a quick 10-Row fingerless glove?  The pattern calls for using different colors of yarn to make stripes, but I wasn't that brave.   It's FREE!

10-Row Stripey Fingerless Gloves

If you would like detailed information on the yarn and hooks I used, please visit my Ravelry page.  

Ravelry

I may be linking to THESE parties.

Thanks for visiting!

I've Been Featured!

The Humble Homemaker has featured my 3 Ingredient Mango Chicken on her blog.  Have you visited her blog?  You should go now!

Thanks so much!

Great new lipstick

Are you picky about lipsticks?  I am.  I prefer cheap, but hate if they have an odor or taste weird.  When I saw someone recommend a dupe for a $31+ Guerlain lipstick, I was all ears!  

Revlon Colorburst Lipstick

Now, I don't know if this is truly "new", but it is new to me and it is the creamiest, non-flavored, non-odorous lipstick I've ever had from a drug store.   

The dupe for the Guerlain Kiss Kiss Pech Foughese 541 is  Revlon Colorburst Lipstick in 075 Peach.   Apparently in color, texture, creaminess and wearability.  Cool!

I can handle $7-8 lipstick.  And right now, our CVS has them buy one get another 50% off.  (Regular price $8.99)  Here are the photos:

073 Peach

I am not a peachy/coral girl, but it is now that season....this is coming back in style.  And the gal who recommended it has my coloring and I thought....I'd try it.  It is SO pretty.  

I had to go back and get a more normal color since this is so fabulous, and I chose this:

005 Mauve

 

And I thought I'd crack myself up and add "lip" photos.  lol

What's with the wonky lips?  Sexy - Not!!!  I'll just call this my Angelina Jolie lips photo.  lol

With the 2 lip photos, they were taken in a hotel room with my I -phone and this lip gloss over top.  LOVE THIS LIP GLOSS too!

Revlon Super Lustrous Lip Gloss in 180 Pink Pop.  Beautiful color, NO flavor, and not "too" sticky (per hubs).

Credit for Photo

I found this photo online and I actually have all 3 of these and love them......from left to right - Revlon Matte Lipstick in Pink Pout, Revlon Super Lustrous Lip Gloss in Pink Pop and Coral Reef.    She also has swatches if you follow that credit link above.

Did you know that you can take a different color lip gloss and put over lipstick and create a custom color?  Like take that Coral Reef peachy gloss and put it over darker mauve lipstick?  I never knew that.  lol  I was "matchy matchy" with the two.  In fact, I'm a very new lip gloss wearer in general.  Always thought they were super sticky and yucky tasting.  Are you sensing a pattern here?  lol 

Next up is the following combo (on my shopping list):

Victoria Secret Lipstick in Hot Spot

Milani 3D Gloss in Fashion Diva

Watch this video for just a minute to see her lips......................oh my goodness.........lluuuuvvvv that color!!!

Enjoy!

I Was Featured!

Holly over at 504 Main featured me for my 3 Ingredient Mango Chicken.  If you haven't visited her blog, please do!

For the 3 Ingredient Mango Chicken info, click HERE.

Thanks Holly!

High End Face Mask with Unbelievable Savings

Yes, you read that right!!!  I was watching some You Tube videos the other day, and a beauty gal mentioned that the KollagenX  24K Gold facial masks were on sale at TJ Maxx for $29.99 for 3 of them!  These same masks are used in high end salons and the visits start at $150!

Here is some info on the KollagenX mask:

Active Ingredients

Collagen, 24NM Gold Grains, Hyaluronic Acid, Vitamin E, Rose Essential Oil,

Amino Acid, Foliage Extract Essence, Vitamin Active Gene, Purified Water

US Patent Pending / Registered Trademark

I looked REALLY cute with it on for 30 minutes!

Spooky, isn't it!  lol  It is really slippery but felt like velvet.  My skin was beautiful the next morning.  I guess the collagen mask is something else.  And why salons can get away with charging so much!

I also found the under eye patches at another store for $14.99!  Used those last night and this morning, my under eye area is so smooth!

 

If you desire a spa treatment without the spa price, look for these at your local TJ Maxx!  (I haven't found them at Marshall's.)

Added:  I had to put this picture on since it is creeping out my sister!  Love ya Sis!

I've Been Featured!

I've been featured over at Women Who Do It Well for my 3 Ingredient Mango Chicken.  Thanks Jill!!  Go check out her site!

3 Ingredient Mango Chicken

You know you wanna try it!

Makeup Primer on the cheap!

Stick with me here.....

Using a primer before my foundation is something new to me, but with new wrinkles showing up and other imperfections, it sounded interesting.  I did a review on a Korres Face Primer over a year ago and do like that one.   Most reviews state the the best on the market is the Smashbox Photo Finish Foundation Primer but the price ranges from $28 to $49.  No thanks!

So how shocked was I when I saw several reviews for a product you can buy at Walmart for under $7?  Same ingredients as the Smashbox primer......so.....I went on the hunt.  (Didn't find it at Walgreens or CVS, but had success at Walmart).  Here it is:

Yes, you read that right - 

Monistat Chafing Relief Powder Gel.  

Now, it IS over by the other Monistat products for yeast infections, but this product is technically for thighs that rub together and the bikini area?  I think?  But someone noticed the ingredients and thousands have tried it on their faces, including me.  You have to try this!!  It is a clear gel, but feels very powdery....hard to describe.  You will love how it feels.

I've been using this for 2 weeks and LOVE it!!!

If you want your foundation to go on smoothly, greatly decreased lines/wrinkles.......this is your product!  you make up will last all day and look good as new.